Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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