Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
