On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
