and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
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I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
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And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You were trust falling into bushes
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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