he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
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I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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