This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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