Plan B is the new Plan A
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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