my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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