Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
