I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
North Korea, Best Korea!
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
