i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
