Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
