So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
