just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
