in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Everyone says I win the strip club
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
