i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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