I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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