oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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