So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize