New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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