I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
