Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
