nut hugger
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
