yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize