hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
soo... how was my night?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize