oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
how drunk are you?
Several
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
