I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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