I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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