Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
