O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Randomize
