Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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