Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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