I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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