I feel like I'm in dance class right now
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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