oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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