"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable