Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
