Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Randomize
