it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Will exercising make me less horny?
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