My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Bring me that man meat
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
