Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I have aggressive nipples.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
