he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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