Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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