We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize