her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
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I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
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I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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