We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
