Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
