so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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