Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
So I just went to clothing optional bar
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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