what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now