i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Randomize
